my wax god!

My wax god!
As a little girl I was always very curious. I wanted to be many things at once and changed my ambitions every day. One day I wanted to be a medical doctor, the other a painter and on some day I actually woke up and decided I wanted to become a Tomb Raider! (is that even a profession?). Well as I said I was very curious and like all curiosity I got to being curious about God.
I grew up with no devoted religious upbringing; you were free to do as you please apart from the occasional church visits, which I found particularly very boring. I attended a catholic primary school where I learnt to recite psalms and liturgies that held to meaning to me. I had seen the Muslims pray, bowing their heads and I had wondered “how pious “?I wanted something for myself, a god I could call my own and as ingenious as a seven year old can be I set about finding me my own god.
And so I got my candle wax, yes I had some molding skills too (oh I wanted to be a carver too, that was also an ambition), yeah back to the candle wax, which in fact was the left over from my experiment with producing wood polish (what in the world you may be wondering), well I melted my wax and set about making me a god. Afterwards I got a corner of the house where no one will disturb me and yes where my Mum’s broom wouldn’t get to! And set up my very own sanctuary.
Now, the time had come to worship, but therein was the problem. How was I to worship this wax god that I had made?  I tried clasping my hands like I was shown in school, it didn’t feel right at all, then I tried bowing down and banging my forehead, but was still very dissatisfied.  Take note, that mode of worship was just one of the numerous problems I had with this wax god.There was something wrong, I knew there was, this god was supposed to love me, care for me and answer all my problems, instead in spite of all I had done for it, I got nothing in return! So some fine evening, I took my wax god and melted it (it was much better as furniture polish anyways).
A lot of folks are like me back then, seeking to fill a void which only Jesus can fill. We stay in the wrong relationships, pick up various vices and habits and act up just because we try to fit in and feel loved. 
Indeed as someone rightly said, there is a void in man which only God can fill.
Oh, the road has rough and the journey so far exciting.  From that little girl with a wax god, to a young woman with a heart for God. Yes I still want to be many things, my ambitions still run high, i could live a thousand times and still want to make my life count.
what about you? what do you live for?